Je ne veux pas les enfants, part I, and a Tangent

When people say, "I'm having a baby!!" they aren't really telling the whole truth. Yes, they are literally birthing a baby, but they are having a person who will only be a baby for a couple of years. I feel like some people forget this fact when they get preggers.

That's just one of the many reasons I don't want to have children.

I like kids as much as the next guy, I guess. I was a camp counselor for five years and loved it, but that's about all I can take for the rest of my life. I don't want kids. I don't want to be a mother. I literally just shuddered at the thought.

"But Karin! You're only 21 years old! You will change your mind soon enough."

"But Karin! You don't have to turn out like other mothers that you don't like!"

"But Karin! But Karin! But Karin!!!!!"

Blah blah blah, I don't give a crap!

I have many reasons for not wanting to birth an heir. I will share one with you now and continue at a later date.

(NOTE: These are in no particular order!)

1. Lack of Male.

Word on the street is that it takes a male and a female to make a child. I'm only one half of that. YES I KNOW I'M ONLY 21!! That's not the point. Here is the tangent. I probably won't get married. Literally just shuddered again. I just can't see it happening. I can't see myself actually wanting to spend my entire life with someone. Sounds horrific to be honest, no offense to people who are married or plan to get married. UGH! Men! Not worth the trouble.

Which is why...instead of a wedding, I'm throwing myself a very extravagant 35th Birthday Party!!! To which you're all invited, of course. It's going to be AWESOME!!!!!

I told you I would go off on a tangent. I'll post more about les enfants soon!

The Oscars: Best and Worst Dressed

I know, I know. I'm probably the ten gazillionth blogger to write about some aspect of the Oscars today, but it's the most interesting thing going on in my life right now. It's the most interesting thing going on in most people's lives right now. Can't wait for People magazine to come out.

Here are my picks and pics for best and worst dressed at the 80th Academy Awards!

Katherine Heigl in Escada:

Katherine Heigl is stunning in this one-shoulder column gown and old-Hollywood hair and makeup.

Calista Flockhart in vintage Valentino:

I love this dress. I love Valentino and I love vintage. Perfect. Although I'm not so sure about her hair.

Saoirse Ronan in Alberta Ferretti:

A future fashion icon? This dress is beautiful and just right for the 13-year-old. She looks wonderful, not at all terrifying or horrible like her character in Atonement. (Note: She plays Susie Salmon in the forthcoming The Lovely Bones. Can't wait!)

Heidi Klum (sans Seal) in John Galliano:

I know it's Heidi Klum. If it were anyone else it would be 100 times worse. But in my humble opinion, it's just TOO MUCH! Her hair is awesome though.

Penelope Cruz in Chanel Couture:

This is not cool. The drape-thing in front is totally wierd and I have no idea what's going on with the fur/hair/tinsel.

Jennifer Garner in Oscar de la Renta:

She looks like a curtain rod. With ugly curtains. In an ugly room.

Rules for a College Party

**Disclaimer: This post involves discussion of possible underage drinking. I do not wish to incriminate anyone at Occidental College or any other college. The author, who is 21, does not necessarily condone or condemn underage drinking. This post is not meant to advertise or encourage such behavior.

Loyal readers, I'm not going to lie to you or sugar-coat anything: This semester sucks.

All my friends decided to go abroad this semester. Literally.

OK, not literally, but pretty darn close to it. Last semester, when I had friends and a social life, we all partied together on the weekends and had a great time and everything was perfect. The same cannot be said about this semester. No one knows how to be a good guest or a good host.

Many students live off-campus and most of the houses host the occasional party. The party may be large or small, exclusive or open, fancy or casual. Regardless, there will be alcohol. It's college.

As a general rule, the house hosting said party provides at least some alcohol. Alcohol, unfortunately, costs money. Thus, hosting can get expensive. However, the same house almost never has two parties in one weekend, and rarely has a party two weekends in a row. Because of the rotating party venue, the alcohol money usually balances out. I say usually, but let's be honest here: This is Occidental. Some students can put the booze on daddy's credit card anyway.

Most of us, though, cannot afford to supply unlimited alcohol to the general public...i.e., freshmen. Or, gee, sorry, "Frosh" or "First-years" as we call them here at Oxy.

So, to the free-loaders and party-throwers, here are my suggestions to you:

1. Don't go to a party JUST because there will be "free" alcohol there. You should at least sort of know someone who lives there or have a good friend that does.

2. Don't expect there to be enough booze to get smashed. If you want to get smashed, hey--that's your prerogative, but do it on your own dollar and your own legal (and medical) risks.

3. Maybe...bring a 12 to share at a party once in a while. If it's an exclusive or small party, bring something for the host like a bottle of wine.

4. If you have a house, share the love. Host, please. It doesn't have to be a rager. Just host sometimes.

5. Don't be mean and charge people for alcohol at your party. If someone offers, you can accept if you really want to, but don't ask. Putting a jar out may be OK sometimes, but don't push your luck (or your popularity/reputation which obviously is everything at Occidental).

6. Love everyone as a guest and as a host. And just as a person in general!

Peace!!!